Sunday, July 22, 2007

thoughts..

I met an old friend the other day, and somehow, we just got to talking about relationships. He’s just broken up with his girlfriend of four years the previous March. I asked him what happened, and he said “things happen”. Which is true..there is so much sacrifice to be made with maintaining a relationship that sometimes it just gets to be tedious. Forget relationships..even FRIENDSHIPS are getting hard to upkeep. It’s like with today’s lifestyle, you either make the effort to keep in touch, or kiss bye bye to your friendship.

It’s so funny, that even in this modern day and age, people just fall out of touch with each other. In the past, we had snail mail, and that gets lost in the mail sometimes, so there is STILL a reasonable excuse. But now modern technology has enabled us to just send mail with a click of the mouse, thus eliminating our excuse of the letter getting lost in the mail.

All this talk brings to mind a close friend of mine…this person shall remain anonymous. This person is studying overseas at the moment, and this person used to be quite close to me, to the point where even my parents trust this person very much. It doesn’t matter whether I’m out late or not, as long as they know that I’m with this person, then they know that I’m alright. So, this person came back for the holidays, and has made some new friends. And I’m glad for this person. Really, I am. But since then, this person has spent so much time with new friends that this person is almost at the brink of neglecting me. I know I sound shallow. I should let this person have the freedom to choose whoever this person wants to hang out with, and feel happy for this person. I DO feel happy for this person, but it DOES make me feel unimportant somehow.. =(

Maybe it’s my fault, for not keeping in touch, or whenever I’m online, this person isn’t, or whenever this person is online, I’m not. The timing sometimes just isn’t right. Or maybe when I log on, this person logs off. Maklumlar, the time difference. When it’s night for me, its day there, or night there, day here. Then, me also one kind lar, never thought of mailing this person. So how to stay close like that? You tell me…

*Sorry, always using –this person- *

Is seven years of close friendship enough to keep our bond strong? I don’t know. But from past experience, there has to be commitment involved. No use just saying it, you have to mean it.

All this thinking is getting to my head…

I need rest…

4 comments:

Robin Wong said...

hey hey...
I do understand, and can totally relate to your situation.
But I just have to say that, things change over time, and sadly, people also change. It is difficult for a relationship, including friendship, to remain the same.
Nevertheless, I am sure your friend that you referred to as "this person" still sees you the same way, though he did not express it the way he should be. It is nobody's fault when you both got out of touch, but what is more impostant is what you will do. the choice is up to you. If the friend was indeed as close and as trustworthy as you mentioned, I will do all I can to patch things up, and cherish the friendship. If it doesnt work, it doesnt matter, because after that, I know I have done all I can to save the friendship, and things do not always go the way we want.

I wont give up on friends without a fight.

choulyin.tan said...

yea, i guess you're right. it is no one's fault when people grow out of touch with their friends.

i have made the decision to continue to try to keep in touch with the person, and hopefully, this would make our friendship stronger. thanks for the advice robin =)

Chen said...

people changes with time. We need to put in efforts to maintain a relationship including friendship. Rome is not built in one day :)

choulyin.tan said...

chen
rightly put. =) Indeed ARome is not built in one day. Therefore, I shall endeavour to further nurture our friendship, so that we can continue to be as before ^_^

Thanks =)